Charlie O'Brien blog: coping with a fussy eater

One of the things I get asked to write about the most is how to cope with a fussy eater.

As far as my 23-month- old son Noah is concerned – food is only acceptable if it’s BEIGE.

Toast, crackers, pasta, chicken, bananas, yoghurts, cod, potatoes, cereal ….. starting to see a pattern?!

Despite having weaned him on a huge range of veggies, fruit, meat and fish, at about nine months Noah decided he would reject all colourful healthy foods and only eat beige stuff.

People laugh when I tell them but actually it’s been the most stressful part of motherhood for me so far. Worse than labour, breastfeeding in the early days and sleepless nights! (And they were all fairly horrendous.)

But I’ve reached a stage of acceptance. I pray and hope that he won’t still be eating just pasta-based dinners when he’s in his 20’s but for now, I just have to deal with it.

So if you are struggling with an extreme fussy eater, here are my top 5 tips to cope!

1) Find their weakness and exploit it!

Ok this sounds harsh, but hear me out. Noah WILL eat pesto on his pasta, so I exploit it.

When he’s not looking I blend a tonne of veggies into it. Broccoli, spinach, cauliflower – you name it. Mostly he doesn’t realise. So if your child will drink fruit or yoghurt smoothies, but refuses all veg – blend up some Kale in there. If they will entertain the idea of cheese sauce – get some cauliflower whizzed up in the blender and add it in.

Do they love chips? Slice up some parsnips and sweet potatoes and whack them in the oven. Find their weakness and exploit it!

2) Don’t listen to the indirect criticism

If you’ve got an extreme fussy eater I can guarantee you’ve heard at least one of these from a relative or friend;

- “Mine were never fussy because of the way I weaned them”

- “You need to put them to bed without their dinner – they’ll soon learn”

- “It’s because he’s picking up on your stress”

- “Oh I have a fussy eater too – last week she ate quinoa but today she refused it”

- “It’s just a phase”

Arrgghhh, all SO unhelpful and so untrue. Statements similar to those above come from people who have no idea what true fussy eating or food aversion is like.

Smile, nod and IGNORE. I do.

3) Change location

A couple of experts have recommended this to me but I hadn’t really tried it until recently. Noah started utterly refusing bananas about 4 months ago, much to my dismay, as it was the only fruit he’d eat.

Last week I offered him one in the living room and bam, ate the lot. He loves them again now. He also point blank refused scrambled egg from 8 months old despite me offering it regularly.

But this weekend just gone, I cooked my husband a birthday brunch and served it on the sofa.

Noah went up to his Daddy’s plate and wolfed down the lot. I know lots of people that set up carpet picnics, and even snacks in the bath! Sometimes a change of scenery really does the trick.

4) Eat out

Obviously not always possible if you’re on a budget, but I’ve definitely noticed that Noah is more open to suggestion and trying new things if we’re in a restaurant.

I think it’s because he realises there is no fridge or cupboard nearby with his ‘safe’ food options to hand. We often look online for meal deal vouchers to make eating out more affordable.

5) Don’t pressurise

I don’t pressurise my son when it comes to food and I’ve started to stop pressurising myself! It helps no one. I’ve never tried to put food in his mouth, or begged him to eat something.

I offer a wide range of healthy meals and snacks and that’s all I can do. As with the recent examples of bananas and scrambled eggs – he often comes around, even if it’s months and months later!

Fundamentally I know he’s growing, he’s very healthy and he’s meeting milestones. I just have to accept for now that this is the way things are.

Good luck!

Keep up with Charlie’s family here