Childline advice on helping children cope with stress

It’s only natural to experience stress from time to time. In fact some of us thrive off it. But that doesn’t mean it’s easy to deal with for everyone.

Stress can have a devastating impact on day to day lives and there many things today which can cause our children to experience stress.

In her latest column for My Kent Family, Childline services manager Wendy Robinson offers some advice on helping children cope...

Troubled friendships, pressure at school, exams or problems at home can all leave children feeling stressed, depressed and anxious.

Last year we delivered more than 106,000 counselling sessions with children struggling with their mental and emotional health and wellbeing.

One boy aged 16 – 18 who spoke to our counsellors said: “I just feel depressed, I have so much work to do and I want to get the best grades but I keep falling short. I feel like I am messing up my chances of getting into my first choice Uni, it makes me feel like giving up.

“I am not sleeping much, because I am trying to revise as much as possible and I just feel exhausted all the time. I have been having suicidal thoughts recently and I don’t know whether I should be worrying about them or not. There is so much competition and I hate that others are doing better than me. There is so much pressure; it feels like if I make a mistake now this will affect the rest of my life.”

It can be really upsetting as a parent to watch your child suffering but we have some tips to help you minimise the impact stress has on their lives.

If they’re struggling to relax, there a lots of things you could urge them to try to help them unwind:

• meditation or mindfulness
• muscle relaxation
• breathing exercises
• listening to their favourite music
• going for a walk or spending time outside
• having a bath

It’s important to set aside some time to relax every day. This could be in their break at school, when they get home or just before bed.

If they’re feeling overwhelmed by pressures at school, it can help them to plan and prepare. Why not encourage them to try:

• Organising their day – make sure they have no distractions and do one task at a time. Breaks are important too to keep them feeling refreshed.
• Planning things – there’s no need to rush through everything all at once. Make sure they give themselves time to do things over a couple of days. Prioritise the most important things.
• Ask for support – reinforce with them that they can come to you any time no matter what they’re worrying about. If they don’t feel they can talk to you, urge them to speak to a teacher or another adult they trust, or one of our counsellors.

Getting active can also really help stress.

Doing something physical releases endorphins into our bodies and these chemicals can help us cope with difficult feelings.

Encourage them to find something that works for them – whether it’s walking, swimming, yoga, skipping, skateboarding or dancing.

There’s more advice on the Childline website www.childline.org.uk and our volunteer counsellors are available 24 hours a day, seven days a week on 0800 1111.