Charlie O'Brien blog: Raising neutral gender children

by Charlie O'Brien

In our house we’re fairly laid back about all things – including colours of clothes and who plays with what toys.

My three-year-old son has not one but THREE pink beakers. Not because I’m trying to make a point, but because Amazon does random colour selection and we always get sent pink!

My five-month-old daughter is currently wearing a blue bib – a hand me down from her big brother. She also wears his old blue vests and tops, and I regularly buy trousers for Noah in the girls’ section of Zara simply because there’s way more choice!

I think parents making a song and dance out of raising their children to be 'gender neutral' is just too far
I think parents making a song and dance out of raising their children to be 'gender neutral' is just too far

Noah also has a doll he likes to look after and I’m sure Luna will enjoy playing with Noah’s trains as she gets older (I’m not sure he will be as keen!)

I think toys are toys and children should play with whatever they want, regardless of their gender. I do also find it offensive if things like doctors dress up outfits are only marketed at boys and I despise slogan t shirts like “boys will be boys” and “girls are princesses” etc.

But I also think parents making a song and dance out of raising their children to be 'gender neutral' is just too far.

I love being female and I’m sure my husband is happy being male! I don’t feel I’ve suffered necessarily because of the gender assigned to me at birth according to my anatomy.

Noah with his doll
Noah with his doll

Yes it IS still a man’s world predominantly. But that’s up to us to teach the next generation to fight for equality and I don’t believe we do this by entirely removing the concept of gender.

An American couple have been in the papers this week declaring that they are raising their children to be completely gender neutral. And while I agree with lots of their points, I am not sure why it requires a label.

I enjoy things that are considered to be stereotypically female – make up, fashion and a bit of pink and I don’t see anything wrong with that.

Watch our gender reveal video we did last year!

Equally if my children come to me in the future and tell me they’re gay, bi sexual, trans or ‘gender neutral’ – I’d like to think I’ll be 1000% supportive. But I will let them decide! I won’t be pushing any extreme ideals onto them.

I am happy that their birth certificates say Male and Female.

It’s getting to the point where some consider it wrong to announce that you’ve given birth to a boy or a girl. Which to me, is bonkers!

What do you think?

Charlie x

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