Charlie O'Brien blog: Dropping the childcare guilt and working from home

At the start of the year I told you that we had bitten the bullet and settled on a lovely childminder to take Noah two days a week.

Childcare is a weird one for me – because I’m mainly at home.

Since I had my son Noah (two years ago next week) my career has changed drastically. I’ve gone from being a radio presenter five days a week to being a self-employed mum who does all sorts of things from voiceovers in our home studio, to writing, vlogging and presenting online.

I consider myself extremely lucky. At this moment in my life I’m able to earn a living whilst watching my son grow AND I don’t have to cram on a packed train every day and endure the smelly armpits of disgruntled commuters.

But I always felt guilty about the need to send him off to be looked after elsewhere for a couple of days. I felt like it made me a bad mum, because I could logistically look after him myself full time and cram in work when he’s gone to bed.

There is also the issue of cost – I didn’t want to be working hard to make money, only to see it all going out again. But I’ve finally accepted it’s so much more than that.

'I can send emails without a train being pushed up and down my keyboard'

Working from home is hard. It’s lonely, it requires self-discipline, and there’s no one to chat to in the staff room or canteen (Unless I count Isla my very lazy Labrador)

Most importantly, it’s also virtually impossible to concentrate fully with a demanding toddler climbing on you 24/7.

The childminder has not only allowed me to organise my time with regards to work, but it’s allowed me to breathe again. For two days a week I can wee in peace, I can send emails without a train being pushed up and down my keyboard plus I can temporarily be someone other than mum.

And Noah is thriving. I can already see his language and socialising skills coming on and we’re utterly delighted to see each other at the end of the day.

I promised myself that one of the things I would achieve in 2017 was to stop letting mum-guilt get the better of me.

So on behalf of all mums (and dads!) everywhere who use childcare whether it’s full time, part time, or just for some ‘me time’ – let go of the guilt. We’re all just doing the best we can.

Charlie x

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