Charlie O'Brien Blog: Sleepless nights? That's just part of being a new mum

by Charlie O'Brien

When you have a baby everyone asks you how they’re sleeping. It’s a given. And I’m OK with that. I’m on my second child so I’m well versed in baby related child small talk, and I know I ask the question myself to other parents on occasions.

But what really bugs me is when people tell me my baby is naughty because she wakes up a lot.

And what’s worse is that I find myself nodding along with them!

They may wake me up but they're also very cute
They may wake me up but they're also very cute

My first child Noah didn’t sleep through the night until he was 16 months old. Relatives, strangers and health professionals all encouraged me to leave him to scream. I never once listened to this 'advice' and he is now a fantastic sleeper and only wakes if he’s poorly.

'My husband and I actually found ourselves laughing about it because it seemed a better way to cope than crying at 3am'

Luna my baby is five months and wakes a lot at the moment. She wakes for milk, for cuddles, and because she suffers badly with silent reflux and that causes a whole load of nasty symptoms including permanent congestion.

It is also a scientific fact that babies wake when they’re going through big developmental changes. It’s actually a sign that they’re flourishing.

Of course it’s tough. The other night she woke 12 times! My husband and I actually found ourselves laughing about it because it seemed a better way to cope than crying at 3am.

But however many times she wakes and however knackered I am – she’s not naughty.

Luna feeling a little sad with bad silent reflux
Luna feeling a little sad with bad silent reflux

She’s a baby and I know this is ENTIRELY NORMAL.

As a nation we’re obsessed with baby sleep and wanting them to not disturb us from a very very young age. There is a huge market for products to assist with this – machines and gadgets than promise a to hush your baby so you can sleep.

But the fact is – babies wake up, and it’s ok.

Yes my eye bags get bigger by the day and yes of course I miss my sleep. But I know this isn’t forever and I’ll be there for her in the night, every single time she wakes.

But more importantly I need to stop being so British and politely nodding along when people tell me she’s 'a naughty one'. Because she’s not naughty. She’s just a baby.

Charlie x

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